How To Calm an Overstimulated HSC Who Has Trouble Sitting Still

Do you struggle with an overstimulated HSC (highly sensitive child)?

In this article, you’ll learn:

• About our sixth sense: what the vestibular system is and why you need to know about it
• Spirited kids want more vestibular input
• Best activities for a spirited HSC who likes vestibular stimuli
• Top 5 ways to help your overstimulated HSC
  1. Provide a quiet environment
  2. Choose slow, rhythmic strategies
  3. Give a goal, a start, and a stop
  4. Give your kid opportunities to move during seated activities
  5. Have them do heavy work activities

Before I had a spirited child, I doubted they even existed. I thought an overstimulated kid was a case of poor parenting or bad teachers.

Then my son was born – a colicky newborn, then a spirited and warm-hearted little boy that could not sit still. As a baby, he got a thrill from his physical therapy sessions while other babies screamed. He took pride in saying big words when he was barely two and a half. I read the first three volumes of Harry Potter to him when he was 4-5 years old, and we co-slept until he was six. My son would hear anything around him even when we thought he didn’t pay attention. When he missed bedtime or went somewhere new, he got so overstimulated that he would bounce off the walls.

It became evident that he was brilliant, so we pinned his high energy and quirks to his sensitivity trait. My husband was an HSP, and my son seemed to have a similar temperament.   

But as he grew, so did our expectations regarding his behavior. As a result, his meltdowns became more frequent while our patience shrank.

The doctors said it wasn’t ADHD because he was on his best behavior during class. For instance, like other HSCs, he had an excellent capacity to focus in appropriate environments.

The only problem was his constant need for physical activities like jumping and climbing, which made him more hyper instead of burning off his energy.

I started researching if there was an underlying reason for his behavior and what I could do about it.

What I found out helped us tremendously and changed our perspective.

Before diving in, please remember that I am a parent, like you. I’m not a psychologist, occupational therapist, or pediatrician. But, like you, I’m a worried parent.

Our sixth sense: what the vestibular system is and why you need to know about it

We learned in school that we have five senses: sight, smell, taste, hearing, and touch.

Well, science has evolved, and we now have eight senses. The three most recently discovered are: vestibular (inner ear), proprioceptive and interoceptive.

We will now talk about the vestibular (inner ear) sense.

The vestibular sense helps coordinate our movements and maintain our balance simultaneously. It gives us a sense of body position and balance.

We have had motion sensors in our inner ear since the beginning. These tiny nerve endings have helped humans rapidly turn and run from danger without falling and tripping.

Spirited kids want more vestibular input

Is your child a daredevil on the playground?

While a good sense of balance is essential, some people can’t have enough of it. Instead, they get a thrill from fast and jerky movements.

For example, if you have a high-energy child like me, you’ve probably noticed these kids don’t seem to get dizzy, no matter how much they spin, sway and swing. My kid can jump on the trampoline for an hour straight without losing balance. Similarly, such kids like to hang their heads upside down on the couch when watching TV. Also, they take excessive risks on the playground. In a nutshell, they enjoy challenges against gravity.

Best activities for a high-energy HSC

High-energy HSCs crave movement. And it’s best to offer them planned movement activities in order to avoid meltdowns.

But, at the same time, they are highly sensitive. Consequently, they might feel better in a less stimulating environment, with fewer people and less noise.

For example, they might like to jump on the trampoline in your backyard, not on a crowded playground.

Similarly, they might enjoy a bike ride with you, but they aren’t probably going to feel comfortable going out to play with your new neighbor’s kids.

Here are some activities for your spirited HSC:

1. Run around the outside of the house a few times.
2. Do animal walks (bear, crab, frog jumps)
3. Do a handstand
4. Do a downward-facing dog yoga pose
5. Jump on the trampoline in your backyard
6. Spin in a circle
7. Rock back and forth on your exercise ball
8. Freeze dance
9. Go for a bike ride with your family
10. Try an exercise video on YouTube
11. Make a pillow trail and crawl over it
12. Army crawl
13. Pillow fight
14. Play catch
15. Climb a tree
16. Do an obstacle course
17. Practice martial arts

Top 5 ways to help your overstimulated HSC

Often, kids who seek movement also get more hyper afterward. And everybody gets frustrated: parents and kids alike.

Here are five simple ways you can help your overstimulated HSC:

1. Provide a quiet environment.

When your HSC can’t handle the stimuli, they become overwhelmed. Overstimulation can quickly lead to a meltdown unless we provide a quieter environment (HSCs respond very well to fewer stimuli).

Children often can’t control their environment: babies and toddlers don’t have the power or the knowledge to do so, while older children can’t, for instance, manage the noise level at school.

That’s why it’s essential that we, as adults, take the lead and try to reduce the level of stimuli.

For example, you can turn on soothing music, sit down and read a story, or ask your overstimulated HSC how their day was. These techniques will provide a distraction from jumping around.

2. Choose slow, rhythmic activities for your overstimulated HSC

Slow and repetitive movement activities calm our nervous system. For HSCs, it’s best if there aren’t many other kids around or unpredictable noises so they can focus better.

You can try these activities with your kid:

• row, row your boat
• swinging on a hammock
• using a platform swing.

Here are other outdoor calming activities include:

• nature trail
• treasure hunt
• gardening.

It would be best to decide with your HSC on a list of calming activities. Also, try to discuss with them when they are calm and focused. Otherwise, they might resist trying something new when they are already overstimulated.

3. Give your overstimulated HSC a goal, a start, and a stop

Let’s look at some examples:

• Instead of “Go jump on the trampoline,” try this, “Go jump on the trampoline while I prepare dinner. You have twenty minutes.“
• Instead of “You can go play in the backyard for a while,” you can say, “Let’s go in the backyard and play. How many white pebbles can you gather in 5 minutes? I’ll start my timer. Ready, steady, go!”

4. Give your kid movement opportunities when having to sit still

If your overstimulated HSC cannot sit still when they have to be quiet (for instance, in a restaurant), you might have them sitting on a wobble cushion. Other ideas include a sit-and-spin for younger kids or a bean bag.

Have them do floor puzzles on their tummy and spread out the pieces for them to crawl toward them.

Or have them play with an exercise ball while doing some spelling or mental math exercises.

5. Have your kid do heavy work activities

Experts highly recommend heavy work when kids have a hard time regulating themselves. Read more about heavy work in my article A Scientifically Proven Tool to Help Your Rowdy HSC.

How about you? What are your secrets to calming down your kid when they can’t sit still?

References

1. Elaine Aron, HS Person FAQs, https://hsperson.com/faq/spd-vs-sps/
2. Napa Center, https://napacenter.org/vestibular-input/
3. Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/little-house-calls/202101/why-sensory-vs-behavioral-is-not-actually-thing.